Tuesday, July 27, 2010


The Finisher is BACK IN ACTION.  

Down but not out bitches. Down but not out. I’ve been slow playing my awesome abilities waiting for the Notorious to finish the bathroom. But lately comrades, I’ve had to face some hard truths.  

Truth #1  
I cannot take it anymore.  

Truth #2
I suck at all things home improvement.  

BUT, I am in some ultraparadoxical home-iverse where I cannot make things worse. Complete lack of skill completely doesn’t matter. Anything I do will be an improvement. It’s freeing.  

And “suck” might be a little harsh. I just know practically nothing. Today I received a chastising for not oiling a spackle knife after using it. Plus, I just had to use Google to find out it’s called a “spackle knife”.  


And “chastising” might be harsh, he might have just told me that’s what you’re supposed to do.   

Truth #3  

If you've ever wondered aloud “is there anything sadder than a wall requiring two coats of primer”, there is.  

So, I’ve begun making the living room livable. Current state (tho I do weight the scales with the absolute worst of the worst pics) shown above. I’m scraping, spackling, priming and painting. It’s an interim solution. But the super awesome thing about interim is that you get to decorate twice.  

Ultimate plan is we start with something like this:  

And eventually have something like this:

Interim also means I get to paint the floors! Which I am super hype about. And, just as dream killer Notorious was bursting my floor-painting bubble with warnings of cat fur I found the picture above. Two cats. And a design I will totally copy. In your face Notorious. Should’ve taken aim at the fact that I have zero artistic talent to ever free hand even the stencil. 

But I can free hand this...

Sunday, July 25, 2010

Work Day

So, I am at work. Abusing Internet Policy. But I am sooo excited I just have to post about it. No pics tho. (see above re: at work)

The Notorious said the bathroom would be done today. On Saturday, he said Sunday. He said it. He said it. He said it.

He lied, but still am working with a new home renovation philosophy - the power of positive thinking. It's like that book "The Secret" (that I totally did not read) but with home improvement. Everyone collectively beam your thoughts to the Notorious...tee hee...the power of positive sinking.


Saturday, July 17, 2010

Vacation Day

So. Where have you been? No seriously. It’s been weeks. Where have you been? This is totally on you. Not us….  

We (meaning me) took an intentional hiatus from posting. Mostly to reflect the hiatus that’s been taken on doing. We (meaning the Notorious) hasn’t been without productivity. It’s just been consumed with totally boring things like getting quotes on stucco repair. 

Before indoor renovations can advance, outdoor “tightness” must be achieved.

I know, right? Can you think of anything more boring than stucco? Welcome to my world, where we talk about it. A lot. Getting quotes means we invite multiple different people over to talk about it with us in person. At length. After we’ve already talked about it – at length – over the telephone.  

I get it though. The kitchen wall (opposite the sucko) has been leaking, like, forever. 
 In the world according to P-Ho, it’s nothing a little duct tape won’t fix. Emphasis on the “little”.

Chalk me up as a p-Ho supporter on this ‘un. Stucco is crazy expensive. Like windows but even less fun to select/purchase (which we did). This is the side of our house people. It’s like pedicures in the winter. I say… 

* Gets up, walks around, stretches *  

Woo. Gotta shake it off. Was getting sucked into the stucco hole. Is what I imagine being beset upon by a Dementor is like. Well, if they were real.  

The stucco hole is real.  

Speaking of Harry Potter. We also took a for-reals hiatus to sunny Florida. I would mention something about how stinking hot FLA is if it weren’t for the fact that Philly has been 100+ for days. And as of yesterday, the AC in my car is not working. I had a meltdown (both literally and figuratively) on the road. If you’re uncomfortable in your home, can you imagine the tragedy of now being uncomfortable in your car as well? The Notorious tried to talk me down with kindness and reason. I told him, and I quote, “You’re attempts to placate me only make me more angry.” Wasn’t very nice. I was mad with heat.  

Back to FLA. So, we have been O.O.T. for a bit. Went to hang out with the fam. Was a much needed break from the oppression of home.  

Speaking of the oppression of home. Here’s the latest pics of the bathroom.  

Notorious and Tattoo put in a new window and started to finish the walls. Which circles back to “tightness”. We got a formidable amount of rain in Philly. The new ceiling got wet along the tape lines. We knew it was coming, but now we need to get roof quotes as well.

* Sad face *  

I know there was much hype about The Finisher. But I’m on hiatus on account of a broken spirit. Really it was one of those title only positions anyway. I’ve dedicated my time to much more advantageous goings-on. Just today I have entered:  

  • DIY Network’s Worst Kitchen in America Sweepstakes  
  • Dwell Magazine’s “Room for Improvement” Living Room Sweepstakes  
  • This Old House “Outdoor Oasis” Sweepstakes
  • HGTV’s “Fix and Flip” 150K Complete Home Makeover Contest  
Am pretty sure that last one is a scam. Lot of links followed. Lot of windows opened. Desperate times. Desperate measures. 

The Finisher
Sah-weep-stakes E.